Drinking dilemma

The other day, from whence I knew not, I received an evite to a Santa-themed pub crawl. It struck me as ridiculous, yet appealing. I had no intention of going, but for amusement's sake, I forwarded the message to Pele. I received an unexpectedly positive and enthusiastic response from that quarter. We decided to go and started to plot cheap costuming strategies. We figured out how I could be sufficiently elf-like and Pele could be sufficiently Miss Santa-like, with a minimum of fuss.

Then, Pele started to piece together where the invite came from. "You know, there are few people on here I know. Like this guy…"

"Oh, I totally missed that. I know…wait, who is that?"

"You remember him." Pele said.

"Wait. Ah, I know what it is…it's kickball! Damnit."

"Yes, it's kickball. You know what that means."

It took me a second--a bunch of drunken frat boys 10 years too young for me? No. That wasn't the problem. "Oh. Oh shit! No. This sucks. Damnit."

"He could be there."

"He totally could." I said.

"There's no reason why not."

"I can see him being there. This sucks."

This is all about Tim, of course. The guy I met at kickball. The guy I broke up with a month and a half ago. The guy I saw at a singles event three weeks ago. If we were on that list, then certainly Tim was too. I could imagine him putting on a Santa hat and wandering around drinking for a few hours. There's not even any particular reason that he shouldn't go. Except that it would ruin my evening.

Pele generously offered to email him and tell him not to go. I considered her offer, but thought I should be the one to contact him. I asked (work-friend) Diego what he thought I should do. Diego said that I should send Pele into the first bar on the crawl and if Tim weren't there, we were set. If he were there, we should do our own pub crawl. Pele responded that she could see Tim being a late arrival and that she didn't want to go around dressed like Santa without the other Santas. Fair enough. I told her maybe I would call Tim and try to get the info from him in a sneaky way. If he were planning to go, I'd figure out what to say then. He'd probably resign on his own.

Pele and I were so getting in the spirit of the thing. We were not expecting much except to act silly, hand out candy and get a little drunk. That's all we wanted. That, and the possibility of flirting with some boys. Seeing Tim would pretty much cancel out the fun in all of those activities for me, especially the last one.

Dear readers, care to help out with some options? This is what I have so far:

1. Pele emails Tim and asks him not to come (I rejected this, but she is willing).
2. I call or email Tim and make sure he's not coming (seems fraught with danger for yours truly. But I would have plenty of time to rid myself of any angst related to such phone call by Saturday.)
3. Pele scopes out the bar and makes sure he's not there. We leave if he is. (Boo--we miss fun Santa-themed night.)
4. We do nothing and hope for the best.

I know this seems super wimpy, but I'm pretty sure that if I saw Tim, I would lose the ability to flirt, float and enjoy myself. I'd rather not be on tenterhooks all night waiting for him to show up. I'd rather not be put to the test just yet. In another month, I wouldn't give it a second thought. While I'm (mostly) ready to meet new people, go on dates and generally make a fool of myself, I'm not quite ready to do it in the vicinity of my married ex-boyfriend.

(Tim, if you are reading, do me a favor and let me know you're not coming out on Saturday. That would be a kindness indeed.)

Grateful for: Santa!