I promise...

I promise not to do the following things:¹

1. Post the results of an online quiz.
2. Promote a set of rules about "how to blog."
3. Write about what makes a blog "good" or "bad."
4. Ask someone to link to me (but if you want to, feel free).²
5. Advertise on my blog.
6. List the searches that have led to my blog.³
7. Complain when I have a cold.⁴
8. Describe my toilet habits.
9. Beat myself up for complaining about my dating life because people are dying.
10. Be so frivolous that when I complain about dating readers think, "Geez, it's not like anyone is dying."
11. Be so vague that you can't tell what I'm talking about.
12. Post a picture of myself and take it down in an hour.
13. Write a "100 things" list (mostly because I'm lazy).
14. Ask readers to identify themselves (I am curious, though).
15. Ask what people want me to write about.⁵
16. Fight with people in the comments.⁶
17. Provide details about my sex life (but I'll read when others write about theirs).
18. Complain that I don't get enough comments (I won't complain about getting too many either).

¹Except for the ones I have already done and the ones I will do anyway.
²Unless expressly asked to ask and usually not even then, though I have done it once.
³I may do this on my blog-anniversary.
⁴I've done this but I promise to try and not do it again.
⁵I've done this more than once and very few people responded, so no more.
⁶I did it, I'm sorry. Never again.

Grateful for: lists.