Short movie reviews

I've seen a few movies recently and I keep meaning to write about them. My movie review site is lying fallow…and yet I can't work up the energy to write full, detailed reviews. Instead, I've decided to post short reviews.

One note before I begin, when I saw "Snakes on a Plane" it inspired me and C-money to ponder inventing equally descriptive names for all other films. It's not as easy as it sounds. Most other films are not as "high-concept" as SoaP and the descriptive titles are rather long and unwieldy. However, that won't stop me from trying. Thus, at the end of each short review, you'll see the film's "SoaP title." If you think mine are lousy, suggest your own in the comments.

Oh, one more thing. I have a date tonight and I promise to write about it as soon as I have time. Also, I sent Garret a lame email today indicating lukewarm interest (full text: I had a good time the other night. Maybe we could do it again next week? You know where I am most evenings. :)). Yes, yes, I suck.

On to the exciting short reviews!!

The Illusionist: pretty, charming, entertaining. Striving for substance, but never achieving it. Ultimately hollow. See it, but don't expect any deep meaning. It wants to be deep, it just isn't. Jessica Biel is surprisingly (and pleasantly) more watchable than anything I've seen her in before. Ed Norton and Paul Giamatti are pros, as usual. (Aside: why are we asked to believe that Ms. Biel (24) is the same age as Mr. Norton (37) (they are childhood sweethearts in the movie)? No wonder women are afraid to show their age. Men playing late 20's are actually in their late 30's, while women playing 30-somethings are invariably younger.)
SoaP title: My magic is real. Or is it?

Invincible: low-key, working class drama. Decent acting, no rah-rah hero worship. Only one unnecessary montage set to sappy music. Love interest is actually integral to plot. Needed more character development. Stupid Disney. I still liked it. Didn't cry as much as I expected. That is to say: not at all. Also, I'll pretty much watch anything with Marky Mark in it, but is it my imagination or is he looking a little rugged these days? I'm just sayin'…
SoaP title: Bartender plays football

Snakes on a Plane: it delivers. Perfect balance of serious hard-ass attitude from SLJ, matched by complete idiocy of secondary characters and a sense of humor about the subject matter. Some poignant early scenes lead to tragi-comic mass death on an airplane that is beset by the twin horrors of an electrical storm and a cargo hold full of…well, I don't want to give it away. Not for the squeamish, the violence is cartoon-ish enough not to be terribly offensive and only occasionally shocking. I got one actual scare from this film, which is rare for me, and plenty of good laughs.
SoaP title: duh.

Last, a movie-related item: I often visit The A.V. Club for their movie reviews. Today, I found this entertaining article on Cinematic Reasons to Skip School. It is a list of twelve films with teens as subjects/main characters. To my delight, the first one on the list is Lord Love a Duck, one of the few DVDs I own. I made Pele watch it once and she remarked, "That is one of the oddest films I've ever seen. I can see why you like it."* Um, thanks?

*Misquoted for comic effect.

Grateful for: movie time!

Drop me a line.