The candidates

1. Worst written sentence (ever?): Directly from a report I am trying (and failing) to read:

   This section describes all analytical approaches and specific analytical techniques to be used, and an explanation of how the data collected will be used, analyzed, and presented in the contract reports and briefings.

2. Biggest office asshole (ever?):
   
   I signed up for a one-day "Plain Language Writing and Editing Workshop" (go ahead and flatter me by saying I don't need it). The class is tomorrow, but I don't know the location. I sent an email this morning to the guy who would know where it is. He never wrote back. I called. He was not at his desk. I think, perhaps he's not in today. At 4:30pm I walk to his office and catch him in the hall, "Hey, I wanted to ask you where that class was…"
   
   "Did you get my email?"
   
   "No."
   
   "I sent it out to everyone after I got your message. You didn't get it?"
   
   "No."
   
   "Did you check your email?"
   
   "Did I check...if I'd gotten your email, I wouldn't be asking where the class was."
   
   At least I smiled when I said it.
   
   At 4:41pm he forwards the email to me because he'd left me off the original distribution list. He writes, "I guess there is such a thing as too much concision!" Who says "concision"? Asshole. I hope he's taking the class too.

Grateful for: knowing how to use the dictionary.