Monday, January 03, 2005

Ungrateful wretch

Over the last couple of days I've been having the darndest time trying to think of something to be grateful for. New Year's is the problem, I suppose. It's my least favorite holiday. All that holiday anxiety stuff that most people have around X-mas--I have it for New Year's. Being Jewish definitely let's one off the hook for most holiday depression, or at least it's not the stuff that gets under my skin (plenty of other stuff does). But, there I was on New Year's day feeling grumpy as hell and not wanting to be grateful for anything. I'd had to sleep on a couch, which was planned, but I still didn't like it. Even worse, a bed was available, but claimed by someone else. That was frustrating but I did not complain.

Perhaps the main thing to be grateful for was that my two friends agreed to go out to breakfast in the morning. The first two places we tried were closed, but the third, Bob & Edith's was open, and I had the perfect greasy diner breakfast. It was good--in fact, my eggs, while over easy instead of medium, were HOT. Hot eggs in a diner are rare indeed. So, that's something to be grateful for.

The New Year's Eve party was fine. I drank too much champagne (or champagne-like beverage). There was good food and nice people, I just didn't have much fun. That's NYE for me.

Plus, as a bonus I'd had an unpleasant phone conversation with the yenta-man before I went to the party. He'd called me earlier in the day and left a message. I was really surprised since I thought he must have realized that we didn't actually have a good time on our date. Nevertheless, I called him back in the early evening. I'd like to blame Heather, though it's probably not her fault. She said she wasn't surprised that he'd called me and maybe it would be good for me to call him back and tell him I didn't want to go out with him again. She probably had something there, but it would have been better if I'd waited another day or two to call. Even better if I'd never called at all.

When I called, we chatted pleasantly enough for a time. I let him lead the conversation because I didn't really know what I was doing. He asked what I was doing for NYE and I said I was going to a party. He said, "Take me!" I said, "No." He wanted to know why not and I said because I don't want to. Seemed pretty clear to me. But then I undercut it by saying, well, really, it was at a friend of a friend's house and it wasn't really for me to invite more people. Then he tried to convince me again to bring him, but I kept saying no.

The conversation was ok after that and somehow he started talking about his recent ex-girlfriend and I mused a little about my past relationships. Like I said before, he was interesting and did inspire a few thoughts on my part, which, unfortunately, I verbalized.

As the conversation was ending, he said I should call him again. I mumbled that I probably wouldn't. He asked why not. I said, well, you may have noticed that we didn't actually have a good time last night. I didn't enjoy the way you kept telling me what was wrong with me and I'm sure you didn't like it either.

He got angry. He started to insult me. "If you think you can do better, then good luck. There's a lot of beautiful people on JDate and I'm sure you'll get what you deserve."

I said, "I'm not saying I can do better than you. Probably I can't. I am saying I think we could both be a lot happier with other people."

He continued in an angry cruel way and I kept trying to explain myself without insulting him. I finally gave up and said. "I'm going to hang up now. I wish you the best."

He did call again, but did not leave a message and I haven't heard from him since. That was perhaps not the best way to start the new year.

1 comment:

  1. What a hoo-ha. Perhaps the thing to be thankful for here is he'll not call again. Why is it that people (not all guys, but mostly it seems) tend to sugarcoat their first dates - like oh, it'll get better - hell, if there's no initial "click" there then THERE'S NO POINT IN CONTINUING to date. Now if this guy seemed like an OK friend type, there's a difference... but it starting off on a potential *dating* level, not an "I don't know this person but let's see if I can put him in the friend box or the boyfriend box" level.
    See, you should have come to my NYE party after all!
    Cheers
    KJ

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